for now, I am joyous

"I don't care about who you were, I just want to get to know you now." Ugly Betty

thirst for knowledge

Work is getting eaiser in part because I finally made up my mind about leaving. My company has several very unique projects, but even awesome projects cannot make up for a sense of belonging.

Going back to the law is a way to find kindred spirits.

I do miss working in a law environment because of the kind of conversations one has with very analytical minds. Some of my closest friends practice law, and I appreciate their perspectives.

It's also about having fun with my work. I've hit a plateau in my career; I need more expertise to take it to the next level.

True, I'll work more hours, but the focus will allow me to do more. Why not take advantage of this time to grow, so the time comes to walk away, I'll have the option to scale back?

One step at a time. Let's see where the interviews take me...

the future is here

Went to a San Mateo County business community event yesterday. Cool speech by former State Controller Steve Westly regarding the future of San Mateo County should be green technology. My company is trying to house the green tech in its mega commercial development.

Unfortunately, looking around the room, I realized that there is a disconnect between the speaker and the audience. When Westly put up a picture of Tesla and asked how many people know what it was, I was one of a handful in a room of over 200 people who can relate to the excitement for this all-electric sports car that can go from 0 to 60 in 4 seconds. (Westly's new venture capital company invests in Tesla.)

Come on people!!

I have always been biased against San Mateo County b/c this is the community that voted against BART in the 70s. The original proposal for BART was to loop around the bay, but people who lived in the ritzy cities of San Mateo County feared that the poor from other communities would interrupt their seclusion. Thus, the BART proposal was vetoed, and now we have this incomplete system that still encourages driving.

History aside, I trust that people in San Mateo County may be motivated by one thing - future for their children. It's a problem when most of the kids who grow up in San Mateo County cannot find a job locally or afford to live near their parents.

The future is now. It's up to everyone to tackle the civic problems of the present, and I am truly lucky that my work is my passion. I want to make the world better now, so we aren't sitting 20 years from now with the same mistake that SF made - making it the only city in California losing the population of children. No matter how wonderful the weather, if the cost of living, availability of jobs and the quality of life aren't here, then CA will not be so golden.

just choices, no big deal

A friend of mine is considering whether to locate to a different city to take a new job and a big pay cut.

My rule of thumb on decisions is something I learned from a very interesting woman: Very rarely, do people look back and wished that they did not do something. Most people wish that they had taken opportunities to change their lives.

That golden rule has served me well. That's how I managed to take five out-of-state trips from Jan to mid-April this year! Different people were traveling to interesting places and asked me to go along. Saw so many new places for the first time, and with wonderful company too!

Taking chances also allowed me to be realistic about dating and love. I don't expect the world, but I do know quickly when it's not going to work. I have grown and changed into who I am meant to be in part b/c of the men in my life, and that makes the ups and downs all worth it.

Now, there are so many things I still want to do. Some of the items on my list: salsa dancing, motorcycle license, DJ school, get better at golf, buy another sports car (maybe the Tesla?!), and maybe have kids at some point. ;)

I don't want to waste time thinking too much about choices. Sure, big decisions like whether to go back to law could change me, but I rarely look back and wondered what if. I am always happy to be where I am and change if I want something different.

So D, whatever you decide, there is no "wrong" answer. Follow your gut.

stay tuned

A few friends e-mailed after the 4/22 post. They wondered if the intuition is more of an emotional response rather than a logical conclusion. It's so rare for me to meet someone who is on the same wave length that maybe I should give the guy a second chance?

True, maybe I am not the perfect fit for this guy, but a lot can change in the next few months.

He did call to plan the next date, and we also have tickets to the upcoming film festival.

If I am adventurous enough to want to get to know this guy, why not see where things go for a while? It's so hard for me to relinguish control, yet one of the main reasons why I like this guy so much is his ability to take control.

The interesting thing is that two friends are already urging to call it quits, yet they are the friends who are the most risk-adverse. I am grateful that some others are suggesting that I take a chance, because I would give the same advice. I know too well that big rewards awaits those who risk.

small victory

Got an interview with a law firm for the second week of May. Interviewed with this firm when I first got out of law school. It would be a land use attorney position. Dream job.

Lots to do: dig out writing sample, research on partners and associates.

No matter what happens, I am glad for the opportunity. Funny how the last time I interviewed there, so much was riding on it. Now, it's more a chance to re-enter the practice of law.

the only drawback to intuition...

...is that when things are over with a potential guy, I cannot turn it back.

Just made a date with the latest guy, but immediately after, I knew it was over. I cannot explain it, but during the conversation, I made a prediction that he will meet someone soon. That person will not be me.

This is the worst part about gut; the good comes with the bad.

Now I just have to find the time to break it off. Again.

what did you do for earth day?

Went to Home Depot to look at paint today. They happen to gave out free energy efficient bulb. I ended up buying 2 sets of 4 energy efficient flood bulbs. Just put them in. Wow, what a difference. Most of the old bulbs were just giving out heat anyways. 14 watt bulbs replace the 65w ones. That's a cumulative saving of 408w per hour. If I use the bulbs one hour a day, that's 148,920w of savings a year! Whoa.

Just a thought - Happy Earth Day.