Now that life is very, very good, it's time to think about bigger dreams. Besides my daily comforts and having fun, I want to make a difference in the world.
In some ways, I know I have made a difference because I live by my own rules. By asserting my independence, I am reminding myself and those around me that trusting our intutition is the most important act.
So what's next now that I can get by and have more fun than ever?
You shall wait and see as I enter the next phase of creativity and connectivity...
Monday, January 29, 2007
Sunday, January 28, 2007
celebration
The way I connect with many women in my life is completely serendipitous.
The network of women in my life, most of them older, has enriched my life beyond belief.
Lately, a friend has been on my mind. She is my ex-husband's co-worker's wife. When she first dated her husband, she was living abroad. During her visits to the US, I would be her tour guide b/c for a period, I was unemployed. That friendship has developed tremendously, and now she lives across town with her husband and child.
My thoughts of her gave me the idea to invite her family to dinner. Given her small child, I usually visit her, but it felt time to have a meal at my place.
Due to a schedule conflict, I called just now to reschedule. It turns out that she is pregnant again!! Her second preganancy was doubtful b/c she had her first child past 35, but this was such tremendous news.
I feel a sense of peace b/c she has been on my mind, and now I know why. It is the sacred newws of the arrival of a little one. Oh the joy of having a good friend being blessed by new life.
It's been a good weekend due in part to several female friends just sharing their lives and giving me a lot of support to the changes in my own life. It's both exciting and a bit scary to enter something new, but it's comforting to know that many people are out there thinking of me.
The network of women in my life, most of them older, has enriched my life beyond belief.
Lately, a friend has been on my mind. She is my ex-husband's co-worker's wife. When she first dated her husband, she was living abroad. During her visits to the US, I would be her tour guide b/c for a period, I was unemployed. That friendship has developed tremendously, and now she lives across town with her husband and child.
My thoughts of her gave me the idea to invite her family to dinner. Given her small child, I usually visit her, but it felt time to have a meal at my place.
Due to a schedule conflict, I called just now to reschedule. It turns out that she is pregnant again!! Her second preganancy was doubtful b/c she had her first child past 35, but this was such tremendous news.
I feel a sense of peace b/c she has been on my mind, and now I know why. It is the sacred newws of the arrival of a little one. Oh the joy of having a good friend being blessed by new life.
It's been a good weekend due in part to several female friends just sharing their lives and giving me a lot of support to the changes in my own life. It's both exciting and a bit scary to enter something new, but it's comforting to know that many people are out there thinking of me.
Friday, January 26, 2007
sense of well being
Something is in the air.
I always know when good things are happening. I sleep better, and I am joyous.
This is the best kind of happiness. The kind that permeates into all areas of my life. It is the motivation I need to give unconditionally to others and to try to make the world a better place. This is me being myself.
Lately, been having a lot of these moments. Is this what it means to be in my 30s? This incredible feeling that everything is going my way because I just naturally go down the path that is meant to be.
Oh yeah, life is good.
I always know when good things are happening. I sleep better, and I am joyous.
This is the best kind of happiness. The kind that permeates into all areas of my life. It is the motivation I need to give unconditionally to others and to try to make the world a better place. This is me being myself.
Lately, been having a lot of these moments. Is this what it means to be in my 30s? This incredible feeling that everything is going my way because I just naturally go down the path that is meant to be.
Oh yeah, life is good.
Wednesday, January 24, 2007
feeling unstoppable
Sometimes life is easy, and right now, it's as good as it gets. Yesterday was a bit down b/c I had to do some really silly things, like "chaperon" two checks through to make sure some consultants get paid. At the end of the day, things get done. Got to focus on that.
Round 3 of interviews with a company tomorrow.
After the offer, am going to bring up doing my own outside consulting work. I might not have to quit completely. Stay tuned.
Round 3 of interviews with a company tomorrow.
After the offer, am going to bring up doing my own outside consulting work. I might not have to quit completely. Stay tuned.
Tuesday, January 23, 2007
baby
I have a college roommate who lives in Brazil. She and I were friends for one semester when she came to the US to study masters in material engineering.
That was 1993.
We stayed friends all these years and kept in touch via e-mail and letters. We visited each other. I went to Rio, and she came to SF. That visit to Rio changed me. Now I want to spend some time in South America. Maybe move to Buenos Aires to work.
Next month, she will be a mother. I am excited because she is such a wonderful person and will make the world a better place by her contribution as a mother. I am looking forward to meeting a new friend.
SBC/ATT phone customer?
I received a privacy notice from AT&T. AT&T will sell my information to its family of companies unless I opt out.
Today, I tried to opt out, but the website in the mailing led to a "no longer exist" page.
It took a some researching, but I was able to find the actual page:
https://www.att.com/gen/general?pid=3990
What exactly is "family of companies"? I am sure anyone who pays AT&T mega bucks can be in its family. Still, it'll be interesting to see if I do get more junk mail now that I am a land line phone customer...
Today, I tried to opt out, but the website in the mailing led to a "no longer exist" page.
It took a some researching, but I was able to find the actual page:
https://www.att.com/gen/general?pid=3990
What exactly is "family of companies"? I am sure anyone who pays AT&T mega bucks can be in its family. Still, it'll be interesting to see if I do get more junk mail now that I am a land line phone customer...
making a living
Went to see the Peking Acrobat Sunday. A perfomer fell during the last act, but I doubt many people noticed. She was in the back row, jumping down from a human pyramid. She fell on her side and was in so much pain and could not get up. Her fellow performer carried her off and left her in the wing.
Given where I was sitting, I could see her feet as she laid in the wing before someone could attend to her. :(
It was a good performance, but there is a part of me that thought about what a hard life it must be. To practice endlessly, to travel all the time and be away from families, and to be at risk of injury or death.
In comparison, my life is amazingly cushy. My work is much more mental and social than physical, and I take risks to have fun. I am truly grateful.
Given where I was sitting, I could see her feet as she laid in the wing before someone could attend to her. :(
It was a good performance, but there is a part of me that thought about what a hard life it must be. To practice endlessly, to travel all the time and be away from families, and to be at risk of injury or death.
In comparison, my life is amazingly cushy. My work is much more mental and social than physical, and I take risks to have fun. I am truly grateful.
Monday, January 22, 2007
popularity contest
I like trying new things, and this weekend, it's going to be paintball. A friend suggested it, and I set up the evite, inviting about 60 people.
So far, only 3 of us responded yes.
The idea originator is a bit discouraged, e-mailing me that only 3 people are going.
I've never let the lack of company stop me before. I went skiing once and snowboarding twice all by myself in Tahoe when no one had time to go. All three trips were fine. I got to do what I wanted.
Sure, it's more fun to do things with people, but sometimes, not everyone else is willing to take advantage of the opportunities at hand. I am very lucky to be able to do so many things, either with people or on my own.
Yes, it would be great to always have someone the to accompany me. After so many solo adventures, including international travel, it's all the same to me. I am here to live it up, and if someone joins me for the ride, great. If not, I'll see you in the rear-view mirror!
So far, only 3 of us responded yes.
The idea originator is a bit discouraged, e-mailing me that only 3 people are going.
I've never let the lack of company stop me before. I went skiing once and snowboarding twice all by myself in Tahoe when no one had time to go. All three trips were fine. I got to do what I wanted.
Sure, it's more fun to do things with people, but sometimes, not everyone else is willing to take advantage of the opportunities at hand. I am very lucky to be able to do so many things, either with people or on my own.
Yes, it would be great to always have someone the to accompany me. After so many solo adventures, including international travel, it's all the same to me. I am here to live it up, and if someone joins me for the ride, great. If not, I'll see you in the rear-view mirror!
get that look
Several friends have asked me about how to get toned abs and arms. Yes, there are plenty of exercises you can do, and I am happy to give some one-on-one training sessions.
However, the diet is just as important if not more important.
Take lunch. Today, I made a salad with the following:
spinach
carrot
avocado
apple
orange
sunflower seed
honey
kiwi for dessert
It took more time to cut up all the vegetables and fruits than to eat them, but there was no cooking, so no oil. Usually, I would add extra virgin olive oil and balsamic vinegar for taste.
Three hours later, and I am not at all hungry b/c my taste buds were fed with so many flavors. Eating well does take a lot of time, but it sure is yummy. It's nice to be able to look fit, but I will settle for just being healthy.
However, the diet is just as important if not more important.
Take lunch. Today, I made a salad with the following:
spinach
carrot
avocado
apple
orange
sunflower seed
honey
kiwi for dessert
It took more time to cut up all the vegetables and fruits than to eat them, but there was no cooking, so no oil. Usually, I would add extra virgin olive oil and balsamic vinegar for taste.
Three hours later, and I am not at all hungry b/c my taste buds were fed with so many flavors. Eating well does take a lot of time, but it sure is yummy. It's nice to be able to look fit, but I will settle for just being healthy.
Sunday, January 21, 2007
buy, buy, buy
I live close to a Best Buy retail store, and every so often, I see a line outside the store of people lining up to get the latest gadget.
Now, I am all for cool electronics (I love my XM!), but spending precious time in order to get stuff??
What is happening to our culture? Why is there a priority placed on the act of consumption?
I buy stuff mostly out of need and efficiency. For instance, XM elimates the need for CDs and saves time on music selection. What the people waiting at a store after hours tells me is that we now have created a need to consume. Rather than consume to satisfy other needs, the act of buying something has gained importance as a value.
Whoa! That is alarming because consumption is not an intrinsic need. The act of consumption satsifes a personal urge, and that's it. There isn't any positive externalities. When someone buys an object, that transaction satisfies the consumer's internal urge. The act of consumption then served its purpose.
It's time that we make more conscious choices as a world in how we spend our money and time. Let's learn more about each other and ourselves. Let's buy wholesome food and support local farmers. Let's recycle and save Planet Earth.
I am stingy with my time and money because I want to do more with my life and change the world.
In comparison, in the time that the people waiting for the Wii were in line, I supported six farmers at the Farmers' Market. All these people did was stood around in the cold while I bought groceries for the entire week...
Now, I am all for cool electronics (I love my XM!), but spending precious time in order to get stuff??
What is happening to our culture? Why is there a priority placed on the act of consumption?
I buy stuff mostly out of need and efficiency. For instance, XM elimates the need for CDs and saves time on music selection. What the people waiting at a store after hours tells me is that we now have created a need to consume. Rather than consume to satisfy other needs, the act of buying something has gained importance as a value.
Whoa! That is alarming because consumption is not an intrinsic need. The act of consumption satsifes a personal urge, and that's it. There isn't any positive externalities. When someone buys an object, that transaction satisfies the consumer's internal urge. The act of consumption then served its purpose.
It's time that we make more conscious choices as a world in how we spend our money and time. Let's learn more about each other and ourselves. Let's buy wholesome food and support local farmers. Let's recycle and save Planet Earth.
I am stingy with my time and money because I want to do more with my life and change the world.
In comparison, in the time that the people waiting for the Wii were in line, I supported six farmers at the Farmers' Market. All these people did was stood around in the cold while I bought groceries for the entire week...
Thursday, January 18, 2007
the investigation continues
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asked and answered
"Lindell, Astrid" lindella@samtrans.com
date Jan 18, 2007 3:30 PM
subject Caltrain Comment CT1/190
Ms. xxxxx:
Thank you for your suggestion that Caltrain implement recycling at the stations. We tried this in the past, but people unfortunately dumped so much garbage in the recycling containers that the various recycling companies we were dealing with refused to handle the recycling.
Astrid Lindell
Caltrain Customer Relations Specialist
date Jan 18, 2007 3:30 PM
subject Caltrain Comment CT1/190
Ms. xxxxx:
Thank you for your suggestion that Caltrain implement recycling at the stations. We tried this in the past, but people unfortunately dumped so much garbage in the recycling containers that the various recycling companies we were dealing with refused to handle the recycling.
Astrid Lindell
Caltrain Customer Relations Specialist
do the right thing
There is no excuse for not achieving your dreams. Big or small, our dreams connect us to our destiny. Ideas of what’s next are the universe’s way of guiding us to our fated future.
I firmly believe that one sure way to have realistic dreams rather than copycat fantasies is to have fun. By having fun, we are living in the moment and freeing our conscious mind, and it is during this time of play the subconscious is able to emerge and guide us.
Most of my dreams are not all that fantastic, but they are my true desires that fuel my existence. I am very motivated by achieving these goals, big and small. 2006 was especially so! I am the luckiest person in the world b/c I am living out my dreams right now!!
For some reason, the mainstream culture is not at all conducive for joy and happiness. Think about it – most people worry and stress, leading to poor health and unhappiness. There must be another way!
And there is another way. It’s all about blocking out what others may say and just focus on your own voice. I have had the people closest to me trying to “help” me only to lead me further from what is meant to be. It took years of struggling, but now I am finally on track.
How do I get here? It’s different for everyone, but the number one detractor from happiness is fear. Everyone has heard it before, but being afraid is actually very pervasive in the modern culture. Think about it, the advertising industry uses it all the time to influence consumption. It’s something that parents naturally teach their kids by worrying. Don’t confuse care w/worry and fear. Caring is to wish the best for oneself and others. Worry is imagining that other person can do wrong. Fear is the belief that one might make the wrong choices.
Intuition is the full-proof way of always doing the right thing. If I do what I believe is right at a given point in time, then I am making the best choice I can at that time. Then I am always making the right choice, for me.
Wednesday, January 17, 2007
Madam Speaker
Saw Nancy Pelosi, Arnold Schwarzenagger, Willie Brown, Gavin Newson and Karmela Harris Monday morning for the annual MLK Jr. breakfast in downtown.
Star struck. Nancy is my idol. She is probably the most powerful woman in the country right now. She is so eloquent and passionate, and a mother of five. To me, she is someone who stands up for what she believes and works hard to accomplish her goals despite all odds. To be the first female speaker of the house 200 years after the creation of the country...
More and more, I am learning to stand up for what I believe, in all aspects of my life. Whether it is being generous or not settling at work, I do what my guts tell me even if no one else dares to take the same risks.
What if Nancy Pelosi didn't believe in herself and didn't think she could one day be third in line for the Presidency??
More than ever, I dare myself to imagine big dreams and to make them all come true!
Star struck. Nancy is my idol. She is probably the most powerful woman in the country right now. She is so eloquent and passionate, and a mother of five. To me, she is someone who stands up for what she believes and works hard to accomplish her goals despite all odds. To be the first female speaker of the house 200 years after the creation of the country...
More and more, I am learning to stand up for what I believe, in all aspects of my life. Whether it is being generous or not settling at work, I do what my guts tell me even if no one else dares to take the same risks.
What if Nancy Pelosi didn't believe in herself and didn't think she could one day be third in line for the Presidency??
More than ever, I dare myself to imagine big dreams and to make them all come true!
Tuesday, January 16, 2007
it was -7F
Went to SLC and back. The skiing was swEEEt! Didn't take too many pics. Still getting used to have a fun camera.
Wish that I was a better skiier, so I can really tackle those blacks. Some runs were not pretty. :P
Still, this trip was just the way I like it. Lots of down time, easy skiing and great company! Of course, I also walked around downtown SLC. Was a little sad by the depressed economy. Seeing a city not doing well for me is like someone who loves food seeing spoiled food. What a waste!
Guess the city just never recovered by ramping up too much for the Olympics and not being able to fill all the extra hotel spaces...
Wish that I was a better skiier, so I can really tackle those blacks. Some runs were not pretty. :P
Still, this trip was just the way I like it. Lots of down time, easy skiing and great company! Of course, I also walked around downtown SLC. Was a little sad by the depressed economy. Seeing a city not doing well for me is like someone who loves food seeing spoiled food. What a waste!
Guess the city just never recovered by ramping up too much for the Olympics and not being able to fill all the extra hotel spaces...
Monday, January 15, 2007
pass it on
I happen to be on a cell phone plan where it's free to receive text but not send it.
After some research, here are some sites that allow you to text for free. They are the cell phone company's own websites. If you know the receiver's carrier, then you can text for free.
t-mobile
https://wmg.tmomail.net/customer_site/jsp/messaging_lo.jsp?WT.srch=2&Result_Inq=answer&InqSource=TMO
verizon
https://www.vtext.com/customer_site/jsp/messaging_lo.jsp
spring
http://messaging.sprintpcs.com/textmessaging/compose;JSESSIONID_JFS=Fmkeo6qaNrIaH12d4esUKkmKP244ZEA6dH2JPfq2iU5wVARD5jjO!493563551!182801589!7060!7002
cingular
https://www.cingular.com/olam/gotoPhone.olamexecute?event=goToPhoneLandingPage&reportActionEvent=A_PHON_PHONE_LANDING_RETR
So far, not all of the text have been instantaneous, but Verizon and Sprint seem to be working well. Also, Cingular's site can only be accessed after logging into a Cingular account.
Just some random info that might be helpful...
After some research, here are some sites that allow you to text for free. They are the cell phone company's own websites. If you know the receiver's carrier, then you can text for free.
t-mobile
https://wmg.tmomail.net/customer_site/jsp/messaging_lo.jsp?WT.srch=2&Result_Inq=answer&InqSource=TMO
verizon
https://www.vtext.com/customer_site/jsp/messaging_lo.jsp
spring
http://messaging.sprintpcs.com/textmessaging/compose;JSESSIONID_JFS=Fmkeo6qaNrIaH12d4esUKkmKP244ZEA6dH2JPfq2iU5wVARD5jjO!493563551!182801589!7060!7002
cingular
https://www.cingular.com/olam/gotoPhone.olamexecute?event=goToPhoneLandingPage&reportActionEvent=A_PHON_PHONE_LANDING_RETR
So far, not all of the text have been instantaneous, but Verizon and Sprint seem to be working well. Also, Cingular's site can only be accessed after logging into a Cingular account.
Just some random info that might be helpful...
Friday, January 05, 2007
once again...
I live for the euphoria that dating brings, and I am once again captured by that everything-is-perfect feeling. Except this time around I am old enough to just let it all sink in. I finally realize that most people are quite honest when things are good, and that's what's worth appreciating about relationships.
As I have gotten older, I am going backwards. I am less jaded and ever more hopeful. Perhaps I am truly blessed because I can the good in everyone. What is truly beautiful is always seeing people for who they are and not how they fall short or are not quite who we want them to be.
It's easier to date now than in my 20s because I am not asking for anything except time and an open mind. It's a lot easier to date and to befriend people b/c I am just looking for people to share life experiences to start off.
The next level is to build a life-long connection with those few special people. Maybe it's not entirely necessary b/c I have it with my parents and my siblings. Maybe I can accept the fact that romance is not meant to be right now.
Ironically it is this very acceptance of the possibility of being alone that makes the dating oh so wonderful!
As I have gotten older, I am going backwards. I am less jaded and ever more hopeful. Perhaps I am truly blessed because I can the good in everyone. What is truly beautiful is always seeing people for who they are and not how they fall short or are not quite who we want them to be.
It's easier to date now than in my 20s because I am not asking for anything except time and an open mind. It's a lot easier to date and to befriend people b/c I am just looking for people to share life experiences to start off.
The next level is to build a life-long connection with those few special people. Maybe it's not entirely necessary b/c I have it with my parents and my siblings. Maybe I can accept the fact that romance is not meant to be right now.
Ironically it is this very acceptance of the possibility of being alone that makes the dating oh so wonderful!
Wednesday, January 03, 2007
follow your dreams
So I just committed myself to four months of Spanish classes, Tuesdays and Thursdays. I am psyched about learning another language. Spanish is such a useful language that I cannot wait for all the doors it's going to open. Do have an indirect goal to live in South America for a while but learning the language is a first step.
I am beginning to see that my life doesn't have one big goal, like have a family or make oodles of money. Rather, I have many, many small goals that I am checking off the list. The last three years were fabulous b/c I did so many things. Now, it's more about bigger goals and more self improvement. Cannot wait to see what will happen this year!
I am beginning to see that my life doesn't have one big goal, like have a family or make oodles of money. Rather, I have many, many small goals that I am checking off the list. The last three years were fabulous b/c I did so many things. Now, it's more about bigger goals and more self improvement. Cannot wait to see what will happen this year!
Tuesday, January 02, 2007
absolute bliss
For a while now, I have been quite content b/c life has been very, very good. I have almost zero complaints, and everything is going my way.
Has my luck changed? What is different?
It turns out, it's just my attitude. Am generally a positive person, but there have been quite a few emotional hurdles because I used to expect so much from myself.
These days, it's just all about enjoying the moment. That, and following my intuition. I find it amusing that people spend so much precious time thinking about what to do next. If people use all that thinking time to just feel and do, then they would be happier even if all they did was nothing.
Yesterday and today, there is just a sense of peace and joy. I have done little this holiday season, yet the happiness if overflowing. Well, it's almost time to get moving again. Next up, back to LA/OC!
Has my luck changed? What is different?
It turns out, it's just my attitude. Am generally a positive person, but there have been quite a few emotional hurdles because I used to expect so much from myself.
These days, it's just all about enjoying the moment. That, and following my intuition. I find it amusing that people spend so much precious time thinking about what to do next. If people use all that thinking time to just feel and do, then they would be happier even if all they did was nothing.
Yesterday and today, there is just a sense of peace and joy. I have done little this holiday season, yet the happiness if overflowing. Well, it's almost time to get moving again. Next up, back to LA/OC!
Monday, January 01, 2007
how to please me
Before you get too excited, this is a PG post, so the title is about a spiritual connection.
Looking back at the club experience Friday night, I have to say that a lot of men tried to pick up in all the wrong ways. Many times, men try to impress by doing what they think is important, mostly showing off.
I appreciate the fact that they care and want to impress, but to impress me, I am looking for someone who is completely themselves and can let me be me.
Unfortunately, I have only met a handful of men who is able to put others at ease and can let others be themselves. Even I am not entirely skilled in the art of unconditional acceptance.
So I find myself uncomfortable when men try to impress. Really, if you are trying, it's not going to work.
So the match guys are trying, and it's endearing. At the same time, I find myself pulling back more than usual because I just don't follow the rules of the game. In fact, I am probably labeled a terrible person because I am not returning e-mails. Oh well.
Just like that, the whole dating puzzle has been solved. I am looking forward to playing it by my rules. Similar to my experience with having fun, the dating game is going to be effortless b/c it is, like everything else, all about intuition!
Looking back at the club experience Friday night, I have to say that a lot of men tried to pick up in all the wrong ways. Many times, men try to impress by doing what they think is important, mostly showing off.
I appreciate the fact that they care and want to impress, but to impress me, I am looking for someone who is completely themselves and can let me be me.
Unfortunately, I have only met a handful of men who is able to put others at ease and can let others be themselves. Even I am not entirely skilled in the art of unconditional acceptance.
So I find myself uncomfortable when men try to impress. Really, if you are trying, it's not going to work.
So the match guys are trying, and it's endearing. At the same time, I find myself pulling back more than usual because I just don't follow the rules of the game. In fact, I am probably labeled a terrible person because I am not returning e-mails. Oh well.
Just like that, the whole dating puzzle has been solved. I am looking forward to playing it by my rules. Similar to my experience with having fun, the dating game is going to be effortless b/c it is, like everything else, all about intuition!
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