the two people...

Last night, I ate dinner and watched the end of the Suns-Spurs game with my parents. In three hours of hanging out with the two people who love me the most, all the frustration from work disappeared.

I joked with my parents that I don’t need a man because I have them two. My mother responded that they spoiled me too much, and that’s why I am single. Hehe. Maybe. For one thing, the guy will have to measure up to two of the most intelligent and caring people I know.

Plus, they don’t expect anything from me. Most men that I dated want me to be their ideal g/f or wife. I cannot be anyone’s ideal anything; I only know how to be me. And guess who taught me that?

Lately, I am starting to see that men have so much pressure to be a certain way. They have to be smart, funny, athletic, gentlemanly and successful. I am guilty of putting on the pressure…

It is hard. In the world where everyone is telling you what to do, good luck finding those two people who let you be you.

committed to planning

I submitted a job application this morning. It’s the first step in focusing on planning once again.

Over the weekend, I thought about how I have been unfairly characterizing my current job. It is the opportunity of a lifetime, but I just don’t love real estate development. Even though the thought of building multi-million-dollar projects seemed so exciting when I first heard of the opportunity, I am not quite ready to leave zoning and land use behind.

It is also about fit. After working at over twenty jobs in the last 18 years of my life, I know a thing or two about what makes me happy professionally. I need to be at a place where I can build on what I already know and be with people who share my core beliefs.

This current job is not working out because I spend so much energy trying to fix the system. I am not in the business of corporate re-organization, so why stay and write a corporate processes manual (my latest assignment)?

It is also timing. In three years, I would love to be able to juggle HR/accounting/PR challenges, but right now, I just want to be a zoning planner. We’ll see…